Finding Home

“Home is where the heart is.” We’ve heard it before. It’s a cute little cliché that belongs in a cross-stitch somewhere. It doesn’t really impact daily life, really.
Or does it?
Living in between one thing and another has been something that Joy and I have been thinking about a lot lately. We’ve been waiting on my Indonesian pilot’s license, on moving to Nabire, on my starting to fly solo, on getting pregnant again, on a chance to unpack and settle in. It feels like I’ve been waiting for something for so long. But I’m not so sure anymore that this is only a recent thing.
If I’m really honest with myself, I think I’ve been spending most of my life waiting. I felt called to serve God as a missionary pilot when I was 13. I spent the next 6 years just waiting until I could get to college. Then I was waiting until I could start flying. Then I was waiting until I had my school debt paid off. Then I was waiting to join MAF and raise my ministry support. Then it was waiting to get married, rejoin MAF, and raise more ministry support. And then I was waiting to finish language school. I’ve been waiting for something since I was 13, just so I can feel like I’ve arrived.
But where? To what? This whole time, and especially in the last few months, I’ve been having an increasing feeling of being unsettled. I started to blame it on being “in-between.” But then I’ve been realizing that that is not a condition forced upon me, but accepted by me.
“Follow your heart.” There’s another good one for the cross-stitch pillow.
Funny, it seems like those two can’t both be true. Either you are never at home, or you are following something other than your heart.
Lately, I think I’ve been learning that really,they do work together, and in a different way. Home is where you choose to be happy. While you do that, you also need to choose a dream, and to pursue that. We need both. We need a place to unpack, to settle in, to call home, to be happy in, and something to work for.
Here in Papua, what that looks like for us is learning to be happy living in a tiny guesthouse apartment, out of boxes. It’s learning to be happy right here, in the waiting. It’s also working towards a goal. For me that’s been my kayak project, and our new canoe. It’s harder for Joy to find an attainable goal in the middle of care for Zoe. Overall though, I think we are becoming a happier family right where we are.
That fact alone came, not from outside influence, but instead, a choice that we made. It was the choice to be happy where we are; a choice to be home.
So what are you choosing today?

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